"America might have deserved 9/11, but not this site. No, never!"

- Rev. Jeremiah Wright

Mexican President Enrique Nieto Now Officially Only Person Left in Mexico

(MEXICO CITY) —Being lonely sucks. Almost every person can agree on that. And now-a-days, Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto may probably count himself as suffering from the most acute case of loneliness in the world, for as of March 21st. Presidenté Enrique Peña Nieto sits alone in his office in Mexico City, eyes....

Read more: Mexican President Enrique Nieto Now Officially Only Person Left in Mexico

Obama Just Learning of Existence of This Mysterious ‘‘Hillary Clinton’’ From the News!

(WASHINGTON) —President Obama was shocked and stunned to learn from just watching the news on Wednesday of the existence of this formally unknown yet very important “Hillary Clinton” person who not only had been his Democratic primary opponent in 2007‒2008, had also been his Secretary of State from....

Read more: Obama Just Learning of Existence of This Mysterious ‘‘Hillary Clinton’’ From the News!

‘‘Like, Whatever, Dude’’ Now Leading Among Possible GOP Presidential Hopefuls

(UNITED STATES)  —Democrats seem unshakably behind Hillary Clinton being their candidate for president in 2016.   It is no secret that there is an aura of inevitability surrounding Clinton’s chances of being on the ballot next November.  With Republicans, however, it has been a rollercoaster, with so many possible candidates grabbing the voters’ top choices for....

Read more: ‘‘Like, Whatever, Dude’’ Now Leading Among Possible GOP Presidential Hopefuls

Bitter Cold Causes President Obama to Freeze in Mid-Bullshit!

(WASHINGTON) —As hundreds of millions of people and two-thirds of the nation’s land mass remain stuck in a brutal, unrelenting arctic blanket that has brought endless snow and bitter temperatures as far south as central Florida and freezing New York’s Hudson River solid, there appears to be a silver lining surrounding the miserable sub-freezing cloud covering much....

Read more: Bitter Cold Causes President Obama to Freeze in Mid-Bullshit!

Despite Summit, World Still Plagued by ‘‘Random Angry Unknown Folks’’

(WASHINGTON) —After a highly publicized White House summit on “radical extremism” Wednesday, President Obama concluded that the rash of seemingly endless murderous attacks by “random angry unknown folks” throughout the West and in the Middle East is an immediate threat that must be....

Read more: Despite Summit, World Still Plagued by ‘‘Random Angry Unknown Folks’’

Bi-Sexual Man Who Beat Himself Up Charged With a Hate Crime

(CHICAGO) —A married father of two has been charged under the federal hate crimes statute after breaking his jaw and nose during a fight…with himself, the Chicago Tribune reported Friday....

Read more: Bi-Sexual Man Who Beat Himself Up Charged With a Hate Crime

Study: Thinking of Jeb Bush As President Totally Reverses Effects of Viagra!

(VIRGINIA BEACH, VA) —After a long week of toiling away at their jobs and making sure their teenage kids were asleep, Virginia Beach parents Lauren and Daryl Brenton split a bottle of Malbec, Daryl popped the now famous blue Viagra pill and the couple snuggled into their bed for a night of nookie. The Brentons enjoy a healthy....

 

Read more: Study: Thinking of Jeb Bush As President Totally Reverses Effects of Viagra!

 
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